Using tarot to explore options

I’ve had a lot of things on my mind for . . . well, I guess it’s been a couple years now, since I knew I would be in the Masters in Counseling program.  Besides the obvious focus of school, I’ve been trying to keep my relationships, my spiritual life, and the practical stuff (housework, yardwork) in focus as well.  This has required a balancing act, and sometimes I’ve been successful, sometimes not.  I’ve now finished the required classes, but still have to do my thesis.  For some reason, I’ve had a block on getting it started, much less done.   At first I blamed it on circumstances beyond my control (family related), but then it became obvious it was more than that.  This Summer I realized I had a real block about working on it, and could not figure out why.  This morning I did a tarot reading about it, and it dawned on me this would be a good chance to explain here how I would like (eventually) to use tarot in working with therapy clients.  Knowing the state of therapy in California, it is not something I would consider doing with many clients, and would only offer it if the client had already showed a willingness to work with alternative methods (much like using word association or describing pictures).

Part of the reason I decided to do the reading this morning was that I’m having trouble sleeping.  It is as if too many thoughts are swirling in my mind, many of them having to do with the guilt of not getting things done.  So I decided to do the reading to sort out these thoughts, and figure out what to do about them.  I believe in reincarnation, and previous work led me to believe my Self in another life was involved in this inertia (not getting things done).   If I were working on this with a client, I would probably suggest different parts of their Self (archetypes) are involved in what is happening, and deal with it on that level.  It still works.

Using the cards, I discovered there are four other lives (or parts of my Self) that are involved in my inertia.  No wonder I can’t get to sleep — there is a committee arguing in my head!     :-)      [I don't mean that literally.]   So I created a chart, and asked for information about each of those four lives (or parts of my Self).  I asked 

1. What card best describes that life (or part of my Self)?

2. Why am I dealing with it in my present life (or what part does it play in my life)?

3. What does that other life (or part of my Self) want from me at this time? 

4. What can I do to help heal that life (or part of my Self)?

Without going into detail, it turned out that one life expected me to be able to handle everything and do it well.  With a client I would probably suggest that is their Superego, the part that usually tells us what we should be doing and makes us feel guilty when we don’t.  This seemed particularly appropriate to the reading, because when I asked what it wanted from me at this time, I got the Nine of Swords (am using the Hanson-Roberts Tarot).  That is a picture of a woman unable to sleep, consumed with worry.   Another life (or part of my Self) is concerned with independently learning truth, and sharing it with those who are interested (that was the Hermit).   The third life (or part of my Self) is concerned with being a student, and wants to be successful at it.  And the fourth life (or part of my Self) is most concerned with relationship.

What those four lives (or parts of my Self) want is not mutually exclusive, but each sees what is happening in its own way.  This explained the confusion, but not the inertia.  Finally I realized my life now is so confused by all the “helpful” input, I’ve put on the brakes and said, “Nope, I’m not doin’ nothin’!”  I asked, “What is the cause of my inertia?  How can I blast it away?”  (We’re talking a mountain-sized block.)  The cause was answered by the Magician — believing I can do all things equally well.  There is a set-up for failure if I’ve ever heard one, as I would explain to a client.  [Lots of cognitive-behavioral stuff going on here.]  And how do I remove it?  The King of Swords.  He keeps his eye on the goal, makes plans, uses his intellect to accomplish things (getting rid of those cognitive distortions), and doesn’t let his feelings [I don't feel like doing it!] get in the way.

I tend to use tarot to explore options and get clarity on problems.  What I just described could be used in a therapy session, to help a client with the same things.  It is simply a matter of using psychological language rather than spiritual, to help them recognize what they probably already know (subconsciously).

Random visual combinations

   I have always been fascinated by kaleidoscopes — “an optical instrument in which bits of glass, beads, etc., held loosely at the end by a rotating tube are shown in continually changing symmetrical forms by reflection in three mirrors placed at 60  degree angles to each other” (from Webster’s Encyclopedic Unabridged Dictionary of the English Language).  When I was a child, my cousin had one where you could change the little compartments at the end of the tube, so you could look at colored glass, or transparent shapes cut from plastic, or even one of paperclips.  I’ve always been fascinated by the random combinations of color and form, creating geometrical shapes and beautiful flowers of color.  It is temporary art (rather like watching clouds), but so fascinating, and never the same thing twice.  Recently our granddaughter discovered my  kaleidoscope, and seems to enjoy it as much as I do.    

While the fact that it is temporary art has its appeal, I think it is also the fascination of watching random visual elements, and wondering what they will create.  Chance dictates whether you will get a star, or a flower, or a cross, or whatever.  As I got older and discovered textile arts such as macrame, crochet work, and weaving, I found myself fascinated with varigated yarns.  As I work with the yarn, I am fascinated by the interactions of the colors . . . what patterns they make, and how they sometimes work together to form a clump of one color here or there.  You know the piece will contain these colors, but not quite how they will look until you use them.

Obviously I am not the only one to be fascinated by random visual combinations, or they wouldn’t be selling kaleidoscopes and so many combinations of varigated yarn.  There is even a commercial artist in Eureka, CA, who does performance art where members of the audience particpate in random art, inputting numbers into a formula which determines how blocks of color and form create a painting. 

Then there is the ultimate random visual combination — begatting offspring.  Whether it is animal or vegetable, there are various genetic “laws” that certain results are likely, but we don’t know exactly how it all combined until the offspring is produced.  Will the rose be the hybrid we are hoping for?  Will the foal be a palomino?  Will the child have dark hair or blonde, blue eyes or hazel or brown, fair skin or olive, Grandpa Hubert’s nose or Great-Grandma Pearl’s jawline? 

There is art in the world all around us.  Some of it is beautiful beyond words, and some of it we may wish we had never seen.  Though human art is often the product of great thought and planning, sometimes I think it is the random stuff, and the organized chaos of nature, that is the most interesting.

My drug of choice: Caffeine

   Being a grad student, I thought I knew a lot about caffeine.  Most of my cohort managed to kick or reduce their caffeine habit over semester breaks, and then about a month into the new semester most of us were hooked again.  Last Autumn we had a psychopharmacology class, and in the section on psychostimulants there were several pages on caffeine.  When the professor lectured about it, it turned out our combined experience of caffeine produced more information than even he knew.  Yet in getting ready to write this blog, I learned a few new things about the availability of caffeine.

Caffeine is quite possibly the most widely used drug in the world.  It is found in a variety of natural substances, such as cocao beans, coffee beans, tea leaves, and a whole range of herbs.  Our text book (Mind, Brain, and Drug, by Dawson Hedges and Colin Burchfield) lists its possible medical uses as a reliever of migraine headaches, and for enhancing seizure duration and length during electroconvulsive therapy.  It lists the possible adverse medical effects of vasoconstriction, increased heart rate and blood pressure, reduced cerebral blood flow, and reduced birth weight.  It creates physcial dependence (as anyone who has tried to kick caffeine will readily tell you), and when abruptly withdrawn will produce irritability, drowsiness, lowered mood, anxiety, nausea, and really bad headaches.  Apparently the data on reduced birth weight when a pregnant woman consumes caffeine is under debate.  However, it can cross the placental barrier, which means when Moma has that cup of coffee, so does the baby.  A fetus does not have the enzymes to quickly metabolize caffeine, so the effect on them is much greater, and lasts longer.  Some research suggests it may affect brain development in the fetus.  Caffeine also crosses over through breast milk, with the most obvious result being a cholicy baby.  

So why do people consume caffeine?  It’s a stimulant.  It is that which keeps sleepy drivers driving, and sleepy students studying and attending classes.  It is what keeps people awake at their boring jobs, or after a night of not enough sleep.  It can actually enhance performance and alertness, and during strenuous exercise it can improve endurance.  For adults over 65, it prevents the decline in memory performance that usually occurs in the late afternoons.  (Hmm . . . think that works for those of us under 65 as well.)  Most over-the-counter sinus headache medicines contain caffeine, because it shrinks sinus swelling and allows them to drain.   I’ve also known people who use caffeine as a laxative.

Caffeine does have some drawbacks my textbook didn’t list.  For instance, it can relax the muscle at the top of the stomach, and allow digestive juices to rise into the esophagus (heartburn).   It can irritate the bladder, and cause incontinence.  It may irritate the lining of the intestines.  For women who have headaches or other symptoms just before their period, caffeine can make those symptoms worse.  While the textbook suggested it may help to relieve migraines, for other people it may bring them on.  It can increase anxiety.  Caffeine will also block the absorption of calcium, so giving kids chocolate milk doesn’t do much for their bones and teeth.  And for some people, caffeine too late in the day can make it difficult to sleep.  This list is not exhaustive, and if you talk about caffeine in a group of people, you are apt to hear of other side effects.

How do people get their caffeine fix?  Chocolate, coffee, tea, and soft drinks immediately come to mind.  I went to www.energyfiend.com/the-caffeine-database/ and found information on a range of products, listing milligrams of caffeine per ounce of substance.  Coke Classic has 2.83 mg per oz, and Mountain Dew has 4.58.  Then there are energy drinks like Red Bull, with 9.67 mg per oz.  I noticed listings of 1 ounce drinks you can buy that provide 100 mg per oz.  Average brewed coffee produces 13.44 mg per oz, and even decaf has .70 mg per oz.  However, a Starbucks coffee has 23.25 mg per oz, and that’s before you add the shots of espresso.  (One of my friends works at Starbucks, and says she sometimes feels like a pusher.)  Black tea has 5.88 mg per oz, and even Lipton decaf tea has .5 mg per oz.  Green tea (my caffeine of choice) still has 3.13 mg per oz (but I rationalize I’m getting those antioxidants).  Then there is chocolate (Yum!).  Hot cocoa varies, but is in the .63 mg per oz range.  Unsweetened baking chocolate has 23.2 mg per square, Hershey’s Kisses have 1 mg per kiss, a Hershey’s chocolate bar has 9 mg per bar, and their Special Dark Chocolate bar has 31 mg per bar. 

I’ve discovered people can also get their caffeine fix from lip gloss (Bare Essentials Buzz Latte Lip Balm at $8, and Spazzstick Caffeinated Lip Balm at $2.99).  Or for those who need maximum caffeine to wake up, trying bathing with Shower Shock Caffeinated Soap ($6.99); they say for the maximum buzz, lather and leave the soap on your skin for a few minutes before rinsing. 

I went on an 11-day medical fast once, and that included giving up caffeine.  (I still remember the killer headache . . . it lasted for days.)  A friend did it with me, and we used to sit around talking about what we would eat when we were done.  The first thing I wanted to do was get re-addicted to caffeine.  I’m not sure if it was the taste (chocolate, and jasmine green tea), or the buzz, but I’ve never really been able to let it go.  Even though I know I’d probably be healthier without it.  Ah well . . . .       

“Joe versus the Volcano”

In my first blog about a movie, I gave fair warning I am fond of romantic comedies.  Though Yahoo! Movies also lists “Joe versus the Volcano” as an action/adventure and fantasy/sci fi, it is primarily a romantic comedy.  While at times it is very silly, it is NOT a mindless romantic comedy.  It’s a movie that makes you laugh, and then sticks in your mind and makes you think.

This movie came out in 1990, and was writer John Patrick Shanley’s directorial debut.  It was also the first time Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan were paired in a movie.  While they went on to become serious actors, this was back when they were being given lighter parts.  Thing is, their talent and ability shines through these parts, especially with Tom Hanks.  Hank’s character, Joe, is in a soul-sucking job, and he feels sick all the time.  Told he has just months to live (the doctor is played by Robert Stack), he quits his job.  Along comes a very rich man (Lloyd Bridges) who hires Joe to travel to the South Pacific and jump into a volcano.  As he travels, Joe does some soul-searching, and he falls in love.  When the time comes, he and Patricia (Meg Ryan) jump into the volcano, hoping for a miracle.

Meg Ryan plays three parts: DeeDee, the secretary (whom Ryan says she patterned after one of her dogs), Angelica (a “flibberty-jibbit”), and Patricia.  At one point Angelica asks Joe if he’s ever thought of killing himself (she doesn’t know his mission).  Joe is startled, and challenges her with one of my favorite movie lines: “If you have a choice between killing yourself and doing something you’re scared of doing, why not take the leap, and do the thing you’re scared of doing?”    Later, Ryan as Patricia says my other favorite line from this movie: “… almost the whole world is asleep — everybody you know, everybody you see, everybody you talk to . . . only a few people are awake, and they live in a state of constant, total amazement.” 

Both lines challenge us to really LIVE our lives.  To do that thing we are scared of doing.  Not to plug away day after mindless day, doing the things we are supposed to do just because we are supposed to do them.  Not to be so afraid of the future that we trade our souls for safety.  As I began writing this blog, I realized the first movie I wrote about, “Stranger Than Fiction,” deals with this same theme.  I can’t say I’ve always followed this advice, but I’m getting braver.  A friend once shared this with me, though I have no idea who wrote it originally:  “Life should NOT be a journey to the grave, with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, wine in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally warn out, and screaming, ‘Woo-Hoo, what a ride!’”  I like that idea.     

The movie is rated PG, and includes a great turn by Abe Vigoda as the island chief.  I give it a 4.2.

Which food are you?

   In the movie, “My Best Friend’s Wedding,” Julia Roberts plays a food critic who sets out to disrupt her best friend’s wedding plans.   When trying to explain why she doesn’t think the two people are right for each other, she uses the analogy of food.  She describes the potential bride (played by Cameron Diaz) as creme brulee (a rich,  custard/caramel dessert), and suggests what her best friend really desires is Jello.  “I can be Jello!” Diaz insists.    Even without knowing about the character Diaz plays, I suspect you can see the impossibility of Diaz playing Jello.  The way she looks, her personality — she has too much presence and individuality to be Jello.  

The idea of comparing people to food is interesting, and you don’t have to be a food critic to play this game.  Of course, there are a lot of variables that will change how people approach it.  Knowing a lot about food will give you a wider choice.  There are also the variables of ethnic and dominant culture, socioeconomic status (SES), regional considerations, vegetarian versus omnivore, organic versus junk food, et cetera.   I don’t know the names of various receipes, but I can picture them and their ingredients.  John Cusak would be something with an organic brown rice base and vegetable mix, with something esoteric and possibly dangerous on the side, like puffer fish.  Catherine Zeta-Jones would be something like a spring vegetable pasta, with a light, cream sauce flavored with herbs and red pepper flakes (spicy, filling, delicious, classy).  How would you picture these people as food?  Would you think in terms of main dishes, sides, appetizers, or desserts?  Who immediately comes to mind when you play this game?  Do you think of the people first, or the food first and then search for people to match?

Of course, this is how we see others, and is based on their public personna.  I wonder if their private personnas would match?  How about your private personna?  How do you see yourself?  Back about 20 years ago, when I realized I wasn’t going to accomplish many of the youthful ambitions of my teen years, I realized I was going to be oatmeal.  Oatmeal can be tasty and healthy (especially with additions, like walnuts, ground flax seeds, cinnamon, and tumeric), but it’s not generally something people write about, rave to their friends about, or make movies about.  It’s basic, and something a person could live on.  Think about it . . . would you really WANT to live on a truly decadent, rich chocolate cake every day?  As your only food?  So I decided being oatmeal wasn’t all that bad a thing.  It helped me put my life in perspective.

How do you see yourself?  Which food are you?

Stag and Cat

I have a friend who works in law enforcement, on the night shift from 6 pm to 6 am.  He sees some pretty strange things.  Our community is a mixture of small town and rural areas, so he often sees raccoons, opposums, deer, black bears, and even mountain lions wandering through town in the middle of night.  This story, however, made me smile, and I got his permission to share it here.

It is about 2:30 am, and he is cruising through the high school parking lot, making his rounds.  (The high school is in an area that contains both forest and housing areas.)  As he drives, he notices two sets of eyes in the parking lot; from the eye height, he figures it is a small and a large dog.  As he gets closer, in the ambient light he sees what appears to be a big, brown dog and a small, white dog.  He turns on his side spotlight, and it turns out to be a deer stag with full antlers and a white cat. 

Both animals look at him.  The stag has that deer-caught-in-the-headlights look, and the cat is looking at him like, “What?”  He slows the car and stops, and the stag bolts, going off into the dark of the athletic field.  The cat just keeps looking at him, then casually wanders off in the same general direction as the stag. 

My friend drives onto the road along the high school, and parks under a street light to catch up on his notes.  Five minutes later he notices the stag walking out into the street from the area of the athletic field.  It stops in the middle of the street, as if waiting for something.  A minute later the white cat walks out of the shadows and joins the stag.  Both animals then walk up the street, to where there is a signal and crosswalk (but no vehicle traffic at this time of night).  The stag stops every so often, because the cat is moseying along while the stag is making time.  At the intersection, the two cross together in the crosswalk.  [My friend said he was disappointed they didn't wait for the light to be in their favor.  :-)  ]  The last he saw of them, they were running up the sidewalk on the opposite side of the street, into the darkness.

After watching the recent Harry Potter movies (and reading the books), it kinda makes you wonder.  :-)    Even without that, it is an interesting thing to think about . . .

The new Harry Potter movie

  We saw “Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix” last weekend, but then I was so busy rereading the books in preparation for book #7 that I got mixed up about what had been in the movie.  So we saw the movie again today, and now I can write that , Yes, it is worth seeing.  Which worries me a bit, because apparently that critic in “Time” also liked the movie.  Oh well — even a broken clock is right once or twice a day.

Will say this and get it over with — the book is better.  However, that is the limitation of movies . . . they can only be so long, and you never get quite the detail you can in a book.  Considering the book is 870 pages (the longest in the series), they did a pretty good job of cutting things down to make a movie just over two hours long.  They also did a good job of making sure their rearranged versions of events still stuck to the necessary outline and flavor of the story.  Fred and George’s departure from Hogwarts is still a wonderful celebration, Harry and Cho still get together (and split up), and the last scene with Delores Umbridge . . . well, I don’t want to spoil it for those who haven’t seen the movie, so I’ll just say a lot of detail is missing, but it is still satisfying. 

Having written that, I can also say the movie is very good.  This is a story that is driven by its characters, and the actors do an outstanding job.  While it is obvious Daniel Radcliffe and cohort are now older than the characters they are portraying,  they do such a good job that you don’t mind.  Gary Oldman returns as Sirius Black; he makes long, curly hair on guys look GOOD again.  :-)  He helps us understand how Sirius is both flawed and someone for Harry to admire, and does it very well.  Helena Bonham Carter shows up as the Death Eater, Bellatrix Lestrange.  I had always pictured that character more like Angelica Houston, but Bonham Carter does such a fey, deranged character — she’s very good. I am also pleased with Evanna Lynch playing the part of Luna Lovegood (blonde girl, third from the right in the photo above).  She does an excellent job of making Luna spacey, out of the range called “normative,” but still quite appealing.  The most pleasant surprise among the new characters was Imelda Stuanton as Delores Umbridge — Stuanton REALLY makes this character come alive.  You hated her in the book, and now you will have a clearer focus of how horrible she is after watching the movie. 

The movie is rated PG-13.  Be aware, as the characters get older, so does their focus audience, so you may want to think twice about bringing smaller children along until you’ve seen the movie yourself.  It was very much worth seeing a second time.  Think I’ll give this one a 4.9.  

“The Healing Choice: Your Guide to Emotional Recovery After an Abortion”

When I began this blog I wrote about being a graduate student in psychology, and doing therapy training with clients in Davis House at Humboldt State University.  When they train you to be a marriage family therapist, you get a lot of theory and general outlines about dealing with various clients and issues.  You don’t get a lot of detail; the idea is you will learn the detail as an intern, while working with clients and supervisors.  That was when I discovered this book.

“The Healing Choice: Your Guide to Emotional Recovery After an Abortion” is written by Candace De Puy (Ph.D., LCSW) and Dana Dovitch, Ph.D., MFCC), both licensed psychotherapists with private practices in Los Angeles.  (Published by Fireside Books, 1997).  It is written to be a self-help book, though they encourage readers to talk with a therapist if strong feelings arise.  De Puy and Dovitch encourage readers to use a journal, and work through the questions asked in various exercises, constantly examing their own experiences and feelings.  Mixed throughout the chapters are stories about previous clients (names changed), and what the possible reactions to various situations might be.  It draws on research and their own work with a multitude of clients. Chapters include “The Pregnancy” (often not talked about when there has been an abortion, but still a very real experience), “The Abortion,” “Separation, Solitude, and Isolation,” “Guilt,” “Anger,” “Spirituality and Religion,” “Facing Loss,” “The Process of Healing,” and “Acceptance.”  The chapter on guilt is one of the best discussions of guilt I have ever read, and includes a discussion of mature guilt and toxic guilt.  I’ve used that chapter as a guide for discussing guilt with a variety of clients in a non-abortion context (and in working with my own guilt issues). 

One of the best things about this book is that it does not take sides on the abortion issue.  It does not presume to tell people what to do, instead focusing on healing.  I bought the book when I read an excerpt from their introduction: “This is a book for any woman who feels psychological pain from her abortion . . . this is not a book about judgment, politics, or religion” (p.13).  Even people who are convinced abortion was the right choice may have issues that need healing, perhaps because of their families or the culture at large.  It does address the role of spirituality and how that may affect a person’s healing, but there are no assumptions about spiritual choice.  You will notice I keep writing “person” rather than “woman;” while this book is primarily for women, it also addresses the fact that men are impacted by abortion, and these exercises and chapters could also help a man with the healing process.

This book is a relatively inexpensive paperback ($14 cover price, $11.25 at amazon.com, and am sure you can find it used).  Yet it packs more wise, healing advice than many expensive, fat textbooks I’ve been required to read over the years.  If you have had an abortion, or know someone who has (each year 1.6 million American women have abortions), this book can help you understand and deal with reactions to that event.  I highly recommend this book.

New Moon in Leo

Actually, the New Moon was exact at the moment we went into Void of Course, so I waited and dealt my card for the moon-th after the Moon went into Leo.  According to Daniel Pharr in Moon Wise (Llewellyn Publications, 2000), “When the Moon is about to move from one sign into another, there is a period in which the Moon will no longer be aspected to another planet while in that sign.  The period of time between the last major aspect in that sign and the Moon entering the next sign is called ‘void of course’” (p. 49).  Apparently our thinking during that time is apt to be a bit fuzzy and ungrounded, and decisions made are not apt to produce favorable results.  It is considered a good time for searching within.  However, since I deal a card at the New Moon as a focus for the coming moon-th, I thought it would be a good idea to wait for the Moon to be in its next sign, which in this case is Leo.

A Moon in Leo (again, according to Pharr) “exudes pride, warmth, and generosity, along with dominance, extravagance, and righteousness” (p. 39).  It is more people-oriented.  So it seemed especially appropriate when I dealt the Ten of Pentacles for this moon-th, from the Herbal Tarot, by Michael Tierra and Candis Cantin (U.S. Games, 1993).  In the book that comes with the deck (The Spirit of Herbs), Tierra and Cantin write that the pentacles represent “the inner virtues, values, skill, talents, established conditions, inheritance, or material possessions that have accumulated and are available for use.  There is a sense of consolidation of past experiences and an opening for new opportunities from this foundation . . . it is important to share and utilize these tools in some form of service to the community around you” (p. 94).  They associate this card with Mercury in Virgo, which is about grounded communication (in service to others; practical).  One of their key phrases is “Acknowledging one’s values” (p. 95).   I find this last phrase interesting, because it is one of the lessons that came up during my recent mountaintop experience.

Tierra and Cantin associate wild yam (dioscorea villosa) with the Ten of Pentacles.  Its spiritual attributes are an ability to reveal “accumulated energy and power.  Through its releasing action it will encourage the use of talents, gifts, and possessions for the greatest good” (p. 95).  Several effects are noted for the use of wild yam, and I thought it interesting that one is as a treatment for arthritis and inflammations of joints.  I have a problem with arthritis, so this may be one of those times where the herb is as important as the message of the card.  [NOTE:  I AM NOT A DOCTOR, AND DO NOT SUGGEST YOU USE WILD YAM AS A MEDICINE.] 

I found another interesting association with the Ten of Pentacles, and this one is from The Tarot of Gemstones and Crystals, by Helmut G. Hofmann (AG Muller, 1996).  Hofmann associates the card with the stone, tiger’s eye (the first stone I ever asked someone to buy for me, when I was a child).  From the LWB: ” The tiger’s eye teaches us to tolerate different points of view, making it possible for us to see unity.  It strengthens our inner eye, increases powers of concentration, and makes us more flexible.  In the process, we attract people and things which are important for our development” (p. 59-60). 

So I’ve slipped a tumbled piece of tiger’s eye into my pocket, am going to buy some wild yam, and have created an affirmation for the moon-th:  I acknowledge my value, and share what I have with others.  So far each month has had important lessons for me in the areas indicated by the cards — am curious to see how this one turns out.

Mountaintop Experiences

Most spiritual paths have some form of retreat — a time when you step out of your everyday life, physically go somewhere else for a day or two, and focus on various aspects of spirituality.  Often it means spending time in nature (but doesn’t have to), or in a beautiful place (though I remember one meaningful retreat in a barrio of Tijuana, Mexico).  You may spend time in the company of others, but there is almost always some alone time.  The idea is that you get a different view of life, commune with Deity (in whatever form appropriate for your path), and return to your mundane life a changed person.   In the Christian churches I used to attend, they likened this to Moses going up the mountain and receiving the ten commandments, hence they were called mountaintop experiences.  In the first sermon after the retreat, the pastor always talked about the challenge of integrating the mountaintop experience into your everyday life. 

Last week I had a mountaintop experience, on top of a hill, in a beautiful place, surrounded by nature, with very good conversation, and enough alone time to consider it all.  It took some effort to physcially get there (I forgot to mention, that is also often an ingredient), but even the drive was enjoyable.  (See my previous post.)  It wasn’t planned as a retreat — I was just visiting a friend I don’t get to see often.  We did mundane things, and laughed about mundane stuff.  We talked about our lives, the good stuff and not-so-good stuff, and the spiritual focus was a part of that.  We talked about some of the stuff that really matters to us, and heard new viewpoints from each other in response.  Then there was time alone, to digest what we had talked about and its relevance to our lives.   There were “rituals” to focus on, in the form of tarot readings and some energy work.    We both got something meaningful out of the time, and finished it with determination to make changes in our lives. 

Which brings us to coming “down” off the mountain, and how do we ground our experience?  My first thought when I got home and entered our house, was that I REALLY need to get rid of a lot of clutter and maybe do some redecorating.  At some point I realized I was trying to ground my experience by recreating the ambiance of my friend’s house.  While I DO need to get rid of a lot of clutter, recreating the physical surroundings is not where the real grounding needs to occur.  It’s a lot like sex — the important stuff is what goes on inside your head/heart.  Of course, it took me a couple days to apply that to what was going on, during which time I got a bit depressed.  However, that is also a part of the mountaintop experience — when you return to everyday life, you no longer have that spiritual high.  Like sex, you want to recapture that good feeling.  The real trick is to merge the two states.  Machaelle Small Wright talks about it as merging the mundane and the fantastic, so they are not separate states of being between which you bounce back and forth. 

So, how do you DO that?  How do you ground the mountaintop experience, and live a fantastic mundane life?  Recreating some of the ambiance of your retreat is one way to do that, though they are apt to be small changes.  Think of how you experienced that place with your senses — what were the smells, textures, sights, sounds, and tastes?  Even very small triggers will bring back the feelings you experienced, and help you follow-up on the changes.  What were the changes or ideas that came to you during that time?  How can you accomplish them in your everyday life?  Real change takes time, so don’t expect everything to be different overnight.  Even the people who make radical changes in their outer lives eventually discover they are still carrying the same emotional/mental/spiritual baggage they struggled with before.  So find small ways you can incorporate your new ideas into your everyday life.  Do them until they become a part of you. And then go a little farther.  If you do decide to make radical changes, remember to work on that inner stuff (thoughts, emotions, habitual ways of looking at things), because THAT is where the grounding occurs.

I’ve been writing about this in terms of the spiritual (because I believe the spiritual permeates every aspect of our lives), but mountaintop experiences manifest in many ways.  They may relate to an occupation, or returning to school, or a new relationship with nature, or your health, or your relationships with other people, or creative expression, or . . . well, you get the idea.  These are the experiences that inspire us to become the people we are meant to be.  Namaste.